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Dizzy Gillespie

5/9/2018

6 Comments

 
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Oh, the stares, y'all. The staressssss. It was a beautiful day. People were crawling all over the place and, of course, their eyes also happened to crawl all over yours truly. I had to move locations TWICE, because of people stopping to stare at me. Really hard to act natural when strangers insist on gawking.

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At least say something like oh I dunno, "Hi, how are you?" or "Hi, nice day we're having, eh?" or "Why are you all dressed up like that, eh?" I mean, saying anything at all would have made the ogling a little bit bearable. Smh. I'll get some semblance of peace when I'm dead, I guess. Who knows. Heh.

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Anyway, I wanted to dress up, so I f*cking dressed up. :D This is the kind of outfit I would wear on my first day of work. You know, to really throw off the balance in what I can only imagine would be the most conservative law office of all time, because from what I read, things are pretty buttoned up around here.

​ Looking forward to making my interviewers' eyes bug out when they realize that (a) I'm brown and (b)
​I like to dress like a well-to-do Englishman. I'm sure to get the job, you guys. Really. I'm not worried. ;) Oh and I wouldn't worry about the shaved head. I have shoulder length hair. I know. Hard to believe. I'm an anomaly, dontcha know! I can wear my hair down and look suuuuper normal, I just choose not to. :P
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Sorry, hold on. I just want to wave at some people who crossed the street to stare at me. Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

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That's a head scarf, by the way. :D

Honestly, I've been so spoiled. My first job out of law school was a judicial clerkship in a municipal building and I basically just did research and writing all day. I could wear jeans and a t-shirt. No one cared as long as my work was well-researched and unassailable. It was glorious. The only time I had to dress up was on the off-chance that a case didn't settle and it actually went to a hearing. There were probably about three to four hearings a year. The wheels of justice move verrrrry slowly, in case you weren't aware. So, anyway, I was able to bike to work in jeans and a t-shirt for years. :DDD

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Welllllll, we're not in Kansas, anymore, Toto. I might actually have to squeeze myself into the suit and tie assembly line. Bahhhhhhhh. Who knows. Maybe I'll get lucky and miraculously pass all of my gazillion exams and land a job at a company with an awesome work environment. Fingers crossed! Until then, I should really go all out and wear these kinds of outfits more often, before the joy gets sucked out of me.


Thrifted - Black Fedora, ModCloth Brown/Mint Blouse & ModCloth Navy Polka Dot Scarf 
c/o sunglass.LA - Gold Gilded Cat Eye Glasses
​c/o eShakti - Navy High Waisted Palazzo Pants
c/o FashionMia - Navy Double Breasted Coat

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6 Comments
Alexa
5/9/2018 05:11:59 am

Utterly cool outfit! You really should come to the UK - we're all much too reserved to point and stare at anyone who dresses in a uniquely stylish way. :)

Reply
Anna
5/9/2018 06:54:14 pm

Haha. Oh my. O_o Well, then. England, here I come! Hehe. Thanks, Alexa! <3

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Suzanne Carillo link
5/9/2018 08:28:42 am

Love the outfit. When you dress that well it's normal that people notice. I think you'd be disappointed when you put that kind of effort in and no one pays attention.

Well no ones eyes will pop out because you're brown here. That's for sure. Did you know that the 2016 census for Toronto showed that the majority of people living in Toronto identify themselves as visible minorities? Yeah. And that was two years ago. I'm sure the number has increased since then. Minorities have become majorities here.

As far as needing to conform with clothing choices when working in a law firm here that will probably still hold true. They did have casual Fridays before but I think even then they were kind of picky. The guys always seemed to get away with more than the women. Sadly I think the law environment can still be very sexist.

Suzanne

Reply
Anna
5/9/2018 06:51:35 pm

I was talking about this issue with my friend Ray, who is Chinese-Canadian and has lived in Toronto his whole life and we basically came to the conclusion that my initial reaction to the appearance of homogeneity is the result of gentrification. He said the city and its neighbourhoods have changed drastically in the last 10 years. A lot of people have been forced to move.

I had high expectations, because I did my research about the demographics of the province and the city before moving and so I was just really surprised to be the only brown person at most places that I visit, except the train heh. Cafes, restaurants, brew pubs, film festivals = I'm usually the odd one out.

We do live in a relatively affluent part of town and I see the signs on lawns revolting against "double density." I think I a lot of people are resistant to change and tend to be more concerned with their property values than the availability of affordable housing for lower income people who also happen to be people of colour predominately. It's unfortunate. I mean, I realize I'm still very new around here and there's a lot of the city I haven't seen, but I was hoping I wouldn't have to travel far from my home base to experience the "melting pot" culture of the city. If I have to go "out of my way," then I think therein lies the problem.

As for law office culture, I read a very interesting article written by a black female lawyer who ended up quitting the law altogether as a result of her experience working in big law right here in Toronto. It was pretty disheartening to read about the way she was regarded by her colleagues and the ways in which she was dismissed by senior attorneys who were not of colour. I can't say I'm surprised, but I was pretty disappointed. I realize this was just the account of a single person, but having spent time in different legal environments as a person of colour, I was able to recognize some of the things that happened to her had also happened to me.

So, I don't know. I've been regarded differently on account of my appearance for my whole life. Since elementary school. When you grow up like that, it starts to define who you are and your whole life experience is tainted by the constant reminder that you're different. It's exhausting and I guess I was just really hoping to blend into the "melting pot" and finally have the space to find myself and actually enjoy living, but I don't know. It's a big city. I'll find my place eventually, I guess. <3

- Anna

Reply
Jackalope
5/12/2018 02:03:17 am

They were staring because you’re fabulous! Long time reader here, you always pull off outfits I would never think of, I love how bold and playful your style is!

I don’t know how the law world is, but I hope you kick butt in it. For you, and for the people you represent legally. I doubt it’ll be easy fighting against the whitewashed norm, but the more people fighting against it, the better.

Reply
Anna
5/13/2018 05:23:44 pm

Ohhhh, this means so much to me. Thank you for taking the time to write this. I really appreciate it. <333

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    Hi! I'm Anna <3

    I'm fond of artistic fashion, esoteric music, retro games (the older the platform, the better), delectable noms, good libations, my Maine Coon, Bonaparte, and my Tabby, Winsome.

    Also, I attended university in Hyogo Prefecture and I am proficient in Japanese.


    もし、あなたは日本語が話せる、あたしに日本語で話て下さい!練習が必要だ!*^_^*
    



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